Here we are, in the middle of the holiday whirlwind, that perfect storm of joy and stress.

And to make matters worse, Mercury is retrograde until January first, this time in Capricorn. You might have some issues with money (more than usual), how you talk to people, and your travel plans. Ugh.

But Mercury retrograde also offers us the opportunity to sort things out and what better timing than before the new year starts. Review 2023. Finish up any unfinish business. Let go of things that don’t fit your plans for 2024. Clear out the old, both physical and emotional, to make way for a fresh start. What needs a closer look before you move forward?

Try not to focus on the chaos that Mercury retrograde can bring. Instead, ask how you can deepen your spiritual journey. Here are some ideas.

• Sloooooow dooooown.
• Reflect on 2023.
• Find gratitude and embody it.
• Do a cord-cutting ritual on anything that you want to leave behind.
• Work with the full moon in Cancer on December 27. Practice radical self-care. Ask What does my emotional self need?  And What is my intuition telling me?
• Get ready to set new intentions on January 1^st. Make them meaningful and powerful.

And, finally, join our Facebook Live next Sunday, 12/31/2023, when I will be pulling cards to answer the question of what you can expect in the coming year. Don’t miss this powerful event.

My bother, my aunt and me posing in font of my grandma’s silver tree circa 1966

When I was little, my dad would take me, and then my siblings as they came along, out to buy a Christmas tree one evening each year. My mom never joined us. I don’t know if that was because she hated the cold (she still does), or if it was to get a break from us for an hour or so. That was our tradition, a real tree.

When I’d visit my friends and they had a fake tree up, I felt sorry for them. They missed out on the adventure of going and picking one out. They didn’t have the smell of fresh pine filling the house. They had to be jealous of those of us who did Christmas the right way.

My grandma, on the other hand, had a silver tree with the tri-colored rotating light shining on it. This was the 1960s and that tree was mod as hell. If you had to have a fake tree, that was the way to go.

My husband doesn’t like having a real tree. He hates everything about it from setting it in the stand, to worrying about watering it every day, to having to get it out the door again in January, to finding pine needles on the floor until April. We compromise. One year a real tree, the next year the fake one. They look lifelike now and I can buy spruce-scented room spray.

What holiday traditions do you have? Do you bake cookies? Celebrate Advent? Go to see A Christmas Carol each year? Do you hand mistletoe and kiss both the willing and the unsuspecting? Make gingerbread houses?

Which of those traditions make you feel full of holiday spirit? Which of them leave you saying, “Bah, humbug!”? Which still serve you? Which need to get the boot?

When we take the time to examine our rituals, we’re able to let go of what no longer matters to us. Letting go allows us to feel lighter. Living intentionally empowers us.

Will someone be upset if you don’t serve a festive-looking, but time-consuming yule log cake? Maybe. But standing your ground and honoring your decisions will give you more sparkle and glow.

I was recently reminded by Sara Walka, the founder of The Sisters Enchanted, that being powerful, standing one’s ground and honoring one’s own decisions is what got women burned at the stake in the 1600s in what is now the United States.  They weren’t turning people into newts, they were being outspoken.

This season, change the holiday into what you’d like it to be. Get rid of what doesn’t serve your highest good. Dare to transform into who you want to be. Allow yourself to sparkle and glow from a powerful place deep within yourself.

Sing like no one’s listening          

The first time I heard my daughter-in-law sing, I cried. Her voice is that beautiful.

Mine, not so much. But you know what? My grandson doesn’t care. I sit him on my knee and start singing She’ll Be Comin’ Round the Mountain and he’s all smiles.

Beyond the lullabies, nursery rhymes, and silly songs lies a deeper connection that transcends the melody; it delves into the realms of spirituality, weaving an intricate tapestry of love, bonding, and nurturing.

The melodies resonate not only in the ears but also in the soul of an infant. It is believed in various spiritual traditions that sound holds the power to shape reality and influence the spiritual essence of a being. When a caring adult sings to a baby, they are infusing the atmosphere with positive vibrations, creating an environment that nurtures the child’s developing spirit.

In the simplicity of a lullaby (even if it’s Simon and Garfunkel’s For Emily, Wherever I may Find Her which is what I sang to my children and sing to all three of my grandchildren) there exists a profound spirituality — an unspoken language that connects generations, cultures, and hearts. The act of singing to babies transcends the physical and enters the realm of the sacred, fostering a spiritual connection that resonates throughout a lifetime. It is a reminder that, in the gentle cadence of a song, we find not only the melody of the moment but the eternal rhythm of love and connection that binds us all.

Who do you sing to? Who do you sing with?

My husband and I sing to each other all day long. Granted, sometimes it’s trying to get a song stuck in the other’s head to annoy them, but that’s a form of, dare I say it? love and connection, too.

This is the season of singing to celebrate. Sing out! Create a connection with others by singing together. Connect with Spirit through the sacred connection of song.

Raise your vibration as you raise your voice. No one cares if you don’t sound like Barbra Streisand or Beyonce.  Make a joyful noise.

“I can’t believe both Tim and Karen are dead,” I said.

My friend Michelle and I were sitting on the beach recently, reading and chatting. Tim and Karen were friends of Michelle’s, a nice young couple about my age.

“I know,” she answered. “And they died less than a year and a half apart.”

Do you know people who have died soon after their spouse died? My Aunt Ronnie died and my Uncle George didn’t last three days without her. Or, the one that still gives me eerie chills, a woman from my parents’ church died. Her husband was in memory care. The family didn’t tell him his wife had died, figuring there was all the time in the world. While everyone was at her funeral, he died. No one had to tell him; he knew.

It doesn’t have to be married couples. Look at Debbie Reynolds dying one day after her daughter, Carrie Fisher. My husband’s parents died about a year apart and they had been divorced for over forty years.

These examples are all evidence of unfulfilled soul contracts. We promise to teach and to learn life lessons from people as we enter each lifetime. If we fail to fully learn the lesson, or if we’re locked in an unhealthy pattern or cycle, we come back in the next lifetime to give it another try. A couple’s death dates will be close to each other in order to be about the same age the next time around.

I remember when I first started dating my ex-husband. I had a psychic flash of all the lifetimes we had been together. My thought at that moment was, I hope I get it right this time. Then, after ten years together, when I realized I needed to move on, I hoped I wasn’t dooming myself to another lifetime with him. Please let this be my graduation, I prayed to Spirit and my soul. Let the lesson be complete.

Everyone in our life is there for a reason. You can make yourself crazy trying to figure out what that reason is, especially if you have a large family or an extensive circle of friends. Instead, look at a couple of your major relationships: spouse, a child you feel particularly close to or even always at odds with. Can you see the patterns and cycles? Can you tease out the lesson?

We’ve entered the season where family can bring us immense joy and simultaneously make us go bananas. Take a moment both before and after getting together to find a clue to why they’re in your life. How can you make sure you learn the lessons you came here for?

How they drive you up the wall is your first hint.

Here’s a quiz to help you assess your beauty.

1. How beautiful are you?
   1. I’m beautiful. No question.
   1. I might not say beautiful. I’m me.
   1. What the hell are you talking about?
2. When you pass a mirror, you:
   1. Blow myself a kiss and say, “Hey, gorgeous!”
   1. Look and wonder when you got so old.
   1. Just keep walking.
3. When someone pays you a compliment you:
   1. Say, “You know it! Thanks!”
   1. Deflect the attention by saying you got your outfit on sale.
   1. Ask, “What the hell is wrong with your eyes?”
4. My best feature is my:
   1. Everything!
   1. I used to have ok hair before it turned gray and wiry.
   1. Penmanship.

If you choose mostly As, you are beautiful!

If you choose mostly Bs, you are beautiful! You may need a little work on your self-esteem, but you are beautiful.

If you choose mostly Cs, stop it! You are beautiful!

If you disagree with this quiz’s assessment of your beauty, it may be that you’re comparing yourself to someone else. If so, who? And, more importantly, why?

Who decides what beauty is? And why are you believing it? What is it you don’t think is beautiful about yourself? Is your nose like Meryl Streep’s? She’s beautiful. Do you have freckles like Emma Stone? She’s beautiful. Do you have a gap between your teeth like Anna Paquin? She’s beautiful.

Step into your unique beauty this week. Stand tall. Walk with confidence. Dress in clothes that make you feel great. Stop comparing your face and body to someone else’s. Let go of the idea that there is a standard of beauty.

From now until December 4^th, Venus is in Libra, the planet of love, beauty and pleasure. Let it restore your magnetism and amplify your charm. Don’t doubt your own glow.

Retake that quiz, above. I’ll bet this time you answer with all As because You. Are. Beautiful.

Fake it ‘til you make it?

Do you ever put pressure on yourself to be someone you’re not?

Maybe you wish you were a good little worker bee but your mind wanders. Or you feel you see things only in black and white and wish you could see more shades of gray. Or perhaps you wonder why you seem to be the only one following the rules and wonder if you’ll ever loosen up.

Do you beat yourself up for not being like someone else? It’s easy to do, especially if we feel we aren’t measuring up to the ideal we hold of ourselves.

There are plenty of self-assessment tools out there: Astrology, Myers-Briggs (INTJ, here), Love Language, and Enneagram are just a few. Today, I’d like to introduce you to the Five Elements. Knowing your main element will help you to stay in balance physically, mentally, spiritually, and emotionally.

The Five Elements stem from acupuncture and Chinese medicine. The elements are Water, Wood, Fire, Earth, and Metal.

The Water personality, for example, likes gentle conversations with small groups. They have lots of ideas but follow-through is not one of their strengths.

Wood personalities (that’s me!) can be seen as intimidating. But if you need to get something done, call on them because they are efficient and have a strong work ethic.

Fires are usually happy and excited. And they want to be with others who are happy and excited. If you’re not keeping them entertained, they may give you the slip. And they don’t care what you think about it.

Earths are nurturing. They are also peacekeepers to a fault. They love comfort and love to comfort. They need to give, and they just want everyone to be happy–even if it means they may not be.

The Metal personality is the alchemist. They are also very spiritual. Others’ emotions may be too much for them, so they may lack companions. They tend to be calm, cool and collected.  

Knowing which element you are can help you to feel more relaxed in your personality. And when you know your partner’s element, it can help you understand how and why they react the way they do.

Click here to take the quiz then let me know which element you are!

Chances are, if you read the Mystic Sunday newsletter, you consider yourself a spiritual person. And, as many spiritual people do, you feel you came here, to this life, for a purpose.

But what is that purpose?

By now, I’m sure everyone has heard me talk about my aunt’s husband Scott who said as he was dying that he hadn’t done what he came here to do. That lit a fire under me. I quit my job and changed the course of my career within a month of him saying that.

What about you? Are you doing what you came here to do?

Yes. You are.

And so did Scott. Lying in a hospice, he may have thought he was supposed to be a healer. Or, I should say a healer of a different sort. What he did made people smile. It brought them joy. And smiling and joy always bring healing. He was doing exactly what he was supposed to be do.

So are you. You may feel like you’ve come here to do something BIG and if you haven’t yet accomplished it, you may feel like you’re waiting, incomplete, or even empty. Perhaps there is something big you’ll still do, perhaps not.

If so, you will. If not, guess what—you’re being here is enough. You are enough. Who you are touches people every day and because of something you say to someone or do to them, they in turn touch others.

That influence might be something small. Just the other day, I went hiking with a couple of friends. One of them picked up leaves as we hiked. When we had lunch later, she decorated the table with the leaves she had picked up. I’ll be doing that for Thanksgiving this year. Maybe someone at my table will like the idea and carry it forward, too.

You don’t have to come up with the next big technological breakthrough or cure cancer or discover how to efficiently irrigate drought-stricken areas. Maybe you won’t be the one to invent a smart watch that detects disease or a machine that washes, dries, irons, and folds clothes. Your life has meaning regardless.

Release yourself from the pressure to be more. Stay true to your values. Take hold of opportunities that excite you as they arise. Be authentic.

You are enough just as you are.

From now until the end of the month, the veil between the living and the dead will be thinning. It will be at its thinnest from sundown October 31^st to sundown November 1^st.

Samhain (pronounced sah-wn) is one of the shabbats on the witch’s calendar. It has Celtic origins, having first been celebrated by Celtic Pagans. It marked the new year, the end of summer and the beginning of the darker months of the year (An t-Samhain is Gaelic for November) and was when spirits were believed to roam the earth. The holiday is marked with feasting, dancing, taking nature walks and building altars to honor dead loved ones.

Long ago, costumes were worn to ward off evil spirits and offerings of delicious food were left out for those who had passed on.

Many cultures recognize this sacred time of year. There’s Dia de los Muertos in Mexico and Latinx communities in the United States and All Souls Day in the Catholic and Eastern Orthodox churches.

And of course, we have Hallowe’en  which is short for All Hallows Evening, meaning the day before All Saints Day. These days, rather than honor our dead on October 31^st, we put inflatable ghouls on the lawn and send costumed children out collecting candy.

During this time, it’s easier to communicate with those who have died. Your ancestors and loved ones are always with you but you may not always find it easy to get messages from them. This is also the perfect time to practice divination with tarot or oracle cards, a pendulum, or other tools.

If you’d like to connect with someone who has crossed over, now is the time to try it. You can set up a simple altar with some seasonal items like acorns, colorful leaves, gourds, marigolds or mums, horse chestnuts, or even fruit like figs, apples, or pears. Add a photo of the loved one you wish to get a message from as well as a small offering for them. If you have crystals, good ones to use are labradorite, obsidian, carnelian, smoky quartz or amethyst.

Center yourself. Close your eyes. Set an intention to receive a message of guidance. Light a candle if you like. Visualize a bridge between the two of you and see yourself crossing it. Express gratitude for the message you’re about to receive, then get into a meditative state and see what happens. You may hear words, see something in your mind’s eye, or have a deep knowing of what the message is.

When you’re done, thank the spirit of your loved one again, seal off the sacred space, and come back to the present. Don’t forget to write down what you experienced.

So, as darkness descends, embrace the magic of Samhain and celebrate.

Is the glass half full?

Or half empty? This question has always bothered me. How you view the glass is supposed to shine some light on your disposition, to show if you tend to be an optimist or a pessimist.

However, the glass is rarely without context.

If it’s on a table full of dirty dishes, it’s on its way to empty because someone has drunk half of its contents. See what I mean? If that glass is in someone’s hand, it may be halfway to a refill. That’s the power of positive thinking.

Or maybe the glass is full, one part with liquid, one part with air. Maybe it’s not about the liquid as much as it is the glass which is twice as large as required in this situation.

Face it, the glass is full of possibilities.

But I understand the idea behind it. Some people tend to be more like Tigger, others more like Eeyore. And even when you’re naturally more of a Tigger, you can still have an Eeyore day or two.

I was feeling down the other day. Lately, I’m not as connected as I’d like to be. My friends in our neighborhood moved away. My good friends all live out of state. I’m only working with one class at the local elementary school this year. And now that my granddaughters are teenagers, I rarely see them.

I asked my husband to remind me of a good memory. He came up with plenty of wonderful things we’ve done, but no matter what he mentioned, I could find something wrong with that day, or trip, or party. Oh, bother, as Winnie the Pooh says.

When a good mood seems impossible, it’s important to channel your inner Tigger and find gratitude in the small things.

Before I get out of bed, I give myself a hug, roll over, and appreciate my warm, comfortable bed. I give thanks for the water that comes out of the wall when I need it. I smell the juniper scent of my tea as it steeps. I’m happy that there’s a dishwasher to put my mug in when I’m finished with it. You get the picture.

We always attract what we’re focused on. When we look at our lives with a half-empty consciousness, we perceive lack, and send that vibe out to the Universe, and the Universe sends it right back.

Instead, fill what you feel as a void with gratitude for all the little things in your life and as you begin to feel better, add gratitude for the people who love you, the wonderful things you’ve created, the good food your have, and your strong and healthy body. Fill your consciousness until your (figurative) glass is overflowing.

I’m afraid of heights. Like, unreasonably so. If I have to shop on the second floor of a shopping mall, I am next to the stores, not the railing.

I have one client who is deathly afraid of spiders. She would probably move out of her apartment if she found one in the bathtub.

Another client is convinced she is going to be assaulted if she goes out after dark.

Traumatic experiences in a past life often come with us into the next one, giving us a clue to who we were or how we died.

Other clues come in the form of strong connections to a place or an era. I’ve written before about my connection to New England. I’m almost afraid to visit again because I’ve sobbed for days after coming home when I’ve gone before.

All those people dressed up at the Renaissance Faire? Or the almost 1.1 million people in the Fairy Witch Cottagecore Vibes Facebook group? They most likely had significant lifetimes in those eras.

Past lives come with us into this life in the same way that what you did ten years ago can influence the present. Sometimes it’s with a sense of déjà vu so strong that you swear you’ve been in that exact situation before. And you know what? It’s because you have! The same can happen with a dream so vivid that you can’t shake it off in the morning, leaving you with a kind of dream hangover that lasts all day.

These clues about our past lives help point us in the right direction for our soul’s journey in this life and beyond. They help us to figure out what we came here to do. What lessons do we need to learn? Who do we need to help? Who should we break free from? What wrongs do we need to right? What is our unique purpose?

This week, take a look at any phobia you may have. Take ten to twenty minutes to get into a meditative state and explore it. If you’d prefer to do a guided meditation, try this one by registered clinical hypnotherapist Suzanne Robichaud